I have so much excitement and happiness, I don’t even know where to begin! The past year has been wonderful, but very rough. I moved to Los Angeles from Cleveland in February 2013, and the life event threw me into the worst bipolar depression I have ever experienced. It hit me hard at the end of April/beginning of May 2013. I barely left my apartment for five months. I laid on our mattress.. in my living room.. on the floor.. in the AC.. with the blinds closed.. for FIVE MONTHS. I watched 14 seasons of Law and Order: Special Victims Unit. That takes serious dedication (to my living room floor).
During this time, I didn’t care about my physical health. When my mental health is that messy, it’s hard for me to even shower (my boyfriend can vouch for this). As hard as it was to admit, I gained a lot of weight. I ate the worst possible foods, and my addiction to soda showed up again (I had given it up for good that past December).
Fast forward to today. I read somewhere that our mindset needs to be in alignment with our nutrition plan, or we won’t stick to it. Well, guess what? My mindset is finally in alignment with my goals! Oh my gosh, it feels SO good! I have had a serious sugar addiction that seemed almost impossible to get through. I’m currently detoxing and withdrawing from sugar, and these are the symptoms I am experiencing right now:
- itchy ears (how weird, right?!)
- itchy eyes
- sinus congestion (immune system becomes suppressed)
- severe migraine (withdrawal is no joke, I have no idea how I’m even looking at a computer screen lol)
- hives
But it is worth it. Because these symptoms will eventually go away, and I am finally able to not have soda! I’m finally able to not have chocolate, or ice cream, or grains, or refined sugars/carbs. Yeah, it’s still challenging, but my mind is so clear on my goals that I am able to not have those things! I so badly want to be healthy. I want my digestive issues (candida, leaky gut, etc) to be better. I want to lose this weight (not necessarily to look better, but to feel better). I want to run a half marathon (13.1 miles) this year. I want to be able to somewhat control my moods and emotions.
I posted this status on Facebook yesterday:
“It’s an amazing thing, when you REALLY start to pay attention to how certain foods affect your body. Something that is healthy for one individual may not be as healthy for another individual. I always ate what I perceived to be “healthy” and never truly paid attention to how my body was affected by it. This is why one “diet” (diet meaning what you eat.. the actual meaning of the word) is not best for everyone. I follow mostly a paleo diet, however there are certain paleo-approved foods that I cannot have (and certain non-paleo foods I can have). Tailor your diet/nutrition to whatever fuels YOUR body best.”
Life is completely different when you learn to eat for your health, as opposed to weight loss. When you learn how to have a sustainable diet (again, diet meaning what we eat). I am even learning how to cook and enjoying it! I have never liked cooking haha.
I am loving my Practical Paleo and 21-Day Sugar Detox cookbooks from Balanced Bites! I used them to make dinner for my boyfriend yesterday (which he loved!). *Side note: the 21-Day Sugar Detox comes in two parts: the cookbook and the guide book.
I am learning to love my body and myself each and every day. People who say “I’ll be happy when I am this weight.. this size.. this wealthy..” and so on, those people will not find happiness. Not authentically, anyway. I used to be one of them. But we get to live in the moment, and love ourselves every single day, as we are.
Photo of me at a self-love yoga session with my friend & mentor Elyse
So my point of all this is that it feels so good to have my mindset on track after an entire year! I cannot stress enough how important it is to practice self-love and personal development (read books, go to therapy, join a support group, whatever it is for you), and also to really listen to your body. Pay attention to the foods that serve you and the foods that don’t. Eat for your health. Our bodies are so incredible, they fight so hard for us, don’t we want to fuel it properly?
xo, Lyndsay
- How do you get your mindset in alignment with your goals?
- Was it easy for you, or a struggle? Share below in the comments! 🙂
lyndsinreallife
Lyndsay I love your honesty and your self awareness. You’ve been through a tough year and you’re one strong girl. Can’t wait to see what amazing things you accomplish this year.
Deborah, that means soo much to me! Thank you!! It has definitely been a hard year, but I am super optimistic and excited for what is next! Thank you for your comment, you’re amazing. <3
Great post Lyndsay! Thanks for being open and honest about mental health WITH physical health!
Thank you Lauren! And always 🙂 The correlation is so important!
Great post! Having the right mindset is key to a truly healthy lifestyle. For me it was hitting rock bottom. I had no control over my eating. I didn’t exercise. My hormones were totally out of wack from going off the pill. I felt like a monster! Once you realize you need to, and want to, change to be healthy (diet, quiting smoking/drinking- whatever the case) it is easier to stick with. I am happy to hear that you have found your path to happiness!
Thank you Mary! I’m glad you have found your path to happiness, as well! I just recently decided to go off the pill, actually (and by recently, I mean Monday). The synthetic hormones are hurting me more than helping because of the candida and all that. We will see how my emotions are! Haha. It feels really, really good to finally be in the mindset that I want to be in.
I switched to an IUD. People blame the changes on that but it’s actually your estrogen and testosterone levels trying to balance out. I got cystic acne really bad leaving scars on my back. I had to take strong meds for months for it to go away but now it’s all good. It took about a year though. I was on the pill for 15 years so there was a lot of craziness going on! POOR DAN! LOL
Aw!! Haha. I’ve used it off and on since I was 15, and I had cervical cancer, so because of the scar tissue, I get bad cramps (like I can’t get out of bed). But I am going to treat that more holistically, because the hormones are not helping me at all! I wasn’t on the pill for 3 months last year, and I felt so “normal”.. I’m excited! Nervous but excited 🙂 I’m so glad it all worked out for you after time!!
You really have been through a lot! If I come across any information that could be helpful, I’ll pass it on 🙂
I have, but it really has all helped to shape who I am! And now I can help others with all the real-life experiences and knowledge I have 🙂 Thank you SO much Mary! You are so wonderful. <3
As someone who has also suffered from depression, I understand what you’ve been going through. It is NOT fun. For me, I’ve suffered from eating disorders which have gone hand in hand with depression. Luckily, I have two things that pulled me out of that – I met my husband, and running, which has taught me so much about how to properly fuel myself that I will never go back to disordered eating again! Also…when I first gave up sugar years ago, I had the same reaction (especially hives)! I went to see two or three doctors and nobody could place why that was happening, but this makes sense!
Thank you for commenting Lis! Moving in with my boyfriend has definitely helped (plus the sunshine in LA as opposed to clouds and snow in Cleveland).. and I just recently started running, so that’s good to know!! The reactions to the detox are intense, and I’m glad I know what’s happening, because at first I didn’t, and I was terrified! But the symptoms from consuming sugar are way worse. So you’ve gone without sugar for the past few years? How are you doing with it?
Well, I do have my “bad” days. When it gets to be that time of the month, I crave sugar more and I can’t always control myself, but for the most part, I’m pretty good at eating clean. I feel so much better and so much more full of energy now! I truly believe that you are what you eat…living a healthier lifestyle by implementing exercise and eating better helps me stay motivated and happy!
That’s awesome!! I don’t plan on NEVER eating sugar again haha. I’m sure there will be times when I want a cupcake or chocolate bar or something! I don’t want to deprive myself. That’s how I always ended up bingeing. But for right now, while I’m detoxing, I’m sticking to natural sugars only (and not consuming a lot of that).. these cravings are ridiculous though! I definitely agree with you- you are what you eat. 🙂
That’s the best way to go about it…I stuck with natural sugars for weeks and then by the time I decided I did want something like a cupcake it was too sweet for me and there was no way I would want to finish it, let alone binge! The same thing happened to me this past Memorial Day when I tried to eat a cupcake…way too sweet!
That’s what a lot of people say! I’m hoping it works that way for me too haha. I’m sure it will. I cut out sugar before and I had no issues. I think once the cravings deplete, it will be much easier! Something I’m sure I will struggle with a bit, but definitely something I can handle 🙂
Can I just come over and give you a BIG huge hug? And then a double high five because YOU hit the nail on the head with SO many of my healthy living ideals:
– it’s ALL about balance
– what is “healthy for you” isn’t healthy for someone else
(I struggle defending this ALL the time to others who don’t understand why I can’t eat certain foods because of my IBS, even IF it’s a vegetable/something healthy)
– diet = the food you eat!
– don’t link your happiness to a certain size/weight
I feel as if we were closer geographically, we would get along so well! And I would just like to say, I think you are beautiful! Inside and out, to share so openly with us, and your happiness that radiates from this post, makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, I want to go sing the happy song now!
Haha this is like the best comment EVER!!! LOL you are so cute! Thank you soo much girl! I’m so glad this post came off the way it was intended. I know it started a little gloomy, but I needed to get that background in there haha. I definitely agree that we would get along so well if we lived closer, however I love finding other bloggers who are awesome! 🙂 It feels so good to connect with someone who understands. This comment made my day, THANK YOU!! <3
Wow, congrats for getting yourself back on track! I always thought that moving to some place sunny like CA would bring people out of a depression, not the other way around. Thank you for proving to me that is not always true. People can have rough times no matter where they live. Of course I always think the grass is greener on the other side, you know how that goes!
Thank you! Yes, I was really surprised when I fell into a depression after moving to sunny SoCal! But that’s how bipolar works- you cycle out of nowhere and sometimes for no reason! For me, it really had nothing to do with WHERE I lived, but more so that I was so far away from family and friends. I’m very family-oriented, so not being able to talk to or see my parents, brothers, nephews, and friends was so difficult for me. HOWEVER, living in California does help my depression a lot!! We have clear blue skies almost every day, and that significantly helps my mood! Ohio had a bad winter this year, and I feel like a big part of my recovery is due to the good weather here (and the sun really is brighter in SoCal!). Again, thank you so much!! <3
I’m so happy for you that you’re doing so well! I went through the same darkness for so long – but the good news is that it makes me appreciate life so much more! It’s crazy how taking care of myself and eating real, whole foods makes such a huge impact on my mental health and how I deal with my disorder. I’m so happy for you an admire your bravery in sharing your story 🙂
Thank you so much girl!! I feel the exact same way. I appreciate life so much more, and eating real, whole foods has changed everything! I’m so glad you’re in a happy & healthy place <3
I am so so happy for you! I felt very similarly to the first sentence in this post at the beginning of 2014, and that feeling is returning after I had a depression episode in February/March. It is SUCH an amazing feeling to have, to be excited and happy about your life and where you are headed. I’m so so happy that you’re in a good headspace and headed in a healthy direction! You’re awesome, my friend!!
Your comment is reminding me that I read your post at 3am (6am your time) and wanted to comment on it! Haha. It made me think of this post but now I can’t remember why. So I’ll head over there in a sec. LOL. Anyway! Thank you love!! It’s good knowing there are people who go through similar things. And it’s awesome that you’re in such a good place now! I’m very grateful for you 🙂
<3
Lyndsay, I am so proud of you! It’s been so wonderful to work with you and watch your progress over the past few months! You rock!
Thank you Nellie! Working with you has been life-changing for me. I can’t put into words how grateful I am! <3
I really admire your mindfulness and honesty as many people sometimes feel sorry for themselves when they can not get in the right mindset and end up not making changes to their life at all. It is very empowering when we figure out the correct routine that works for our lives. It is great to hear that you are back on track and succeeding 🙂
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Thank you so much!! That really means a lot. It took me years and it’s a daily struggle but I take control and let go of the things I can’t control!
A thoughtful post and helpful for me as I’ve relied on too much sugar in the past.
Thank you Preslaysa! Im glad this post is helpful. I hope you’ve been able to overcome the sugar issues (theyre very real!). Thank you for stopping by & commenting! xo
Wow you are such light! Self-love is so important, and each day I ask the universe to help me find ways to love myself more, and here I am stumbling upon your wonderful site. I loved hearing your story about struggling with depression after a big move, as I was the same way just moving 30 minutes away from where all my family and friends were. I couldn’t figure it out, moving is so strange, but it’s good to know we have other people out there who we can connect with as we move forward. And I am definitely going to try and cut out sugar, you’ve totally inspired me. Thank you so much for all that you do! So happy to have stumbled upon your blog today via SITS 🙂
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Thank you so much Monique! Im so glad you stumbled upon my blog too 🙂 The first time I moved out of my home was to live with my brother 15 minutes away. I bawled the first night! I think any big change like that is challenging, so I totally understand! I struggle with being so far away from family, and often cry about it. But in therapy I am learning to accept and let go. It’s great! Self-love is huge, and I’m so glad we can connect with others on a similar journey as well! I have a good friend in LA who is a self-love coach- I HIGHLY recommend her. I cant remember her URL, but her insta is @iamruby — youll love it! It helps me so much! Thank you for stopping by & commenting! Im excited to keep in touch on our self-love journeys! xo
Thank you so much for the ruby resource! I am already totally all over her instagram and website 🙂 I have also been following Gala Darling, not sure if you have heard of her, but her website is galadarling.com. She developed the Radical Self Love Bible, which I think is so awesome! So awesome to meet you, and excited to stay connected on our self-love journeys as well!! 🙂
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Awesome! Ruby is doing a webinar conference thing too which seems pretty amazing. I just subscribed to The Bliss Bible, but that one you suggested sounds awesome! I will def check it out! Thank you for that 🙂 I’ll follow your social media once I get to a computer! This WP app doesn’t do much haha.
Congratulations on your new healthy mindset! What an inspiring turnaround. What helped you most to move from such a debilitating depression to being in such a positive place now?
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Thank you so much Farrah! Truthfully, going to therapy and tweaking my medications helped significantly with transitioning to a happier place. But in addition to that, I started reading positive books (The Secret, The Gifts of Imperfection, The Happiness Project, etc), and my boyfriend and I started going to the zoo a few times a week (we would walk for 4 hours and see the animals- great exercise). I allowed myself to feel my emotions, and not blame myself for them. I began to love and accept myself!
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